Value of the Month: Tolerance

What is 'tolerance'?

Explain tolerance to children! From Living Values Activities for Children Ages 3-7:

• We are all unique and have something valuable to offer and share.
• Tolerance is accepting others and appreciating differences.
• Tolerance is accepting myself, even when I make mistakes
• Tolerance is accepting others, even when they make mistakes.

The word "tolerance" is surely imperfect, yet the English language offers no single word that embraces the broad range of skills we need to live together peacefully.

The Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. used the Greek term "agape" to describe a universal love that "discovers the neighbor in every man it meets." The various disciplines concerned with human behavior have also offered a variety of adjectives: "pro- social," "democratic," "affiliative."

In its Declaration on the Principles of Tolerance, UNESCO offers a definition of tolerance that most closely matches our philosophical use of the word:

Tolerance is respect, acceptance and appreciation of the rich diversity of our world's cultures, our forms of expression and ways of being human. Tolerance is harmony in difference.

We view tolerance as a way of thinking and feeling - but most importantly, of acting - that gives us peace in our individuality, respect for those unlike us, the wisdom to discern humane values and the courage to act upon them.

It is interesting that tolero, the Latin root of our English word, means both "to bear, endure, and suffer" and "to support, sustain, nourish, protect." The connection between these two groups of words should now be apparent. The strategy of bearing with, enduring, suffering the pain or hardship associated with disagreement and dispute is itself a fundamental way human beings have of supporting, sustaining, nourishing, and protecting one another. By this means, they sublimate hostility and contain violence, thereby profiting from rather than succumbing to conflict. In the matter of tolerance, there is indeed gain from pain-at the deepest levels of human life and experience.

Stories to Inspire

National Violence Prevention Week

We have just celebrated National Violence Prevention Week and there are many stories that teachers are sharing with us about how LVEP is helping

Lisa Jenkins teaches LVEP in an elementary school on Prince Edward Island. She is quite pleased with the results of the program with her twelve-year old students and noted great strides in self-confidence, the ability to name and talk about their feelings, showing respect to their peers, settling arguments without fighting and caring about the feelings of others. Lisa commented, "Every day I see evidence all around our school and community that the 'anti- bullying programs' are not effective. The kids realize it is the next bandwagon and go through the motions but don't put it into practice. By naming violence, exclusion, etc. and talking about these kinds of behaviors in reference to respecting self and others I think we are having more success with students. They see us living what we speak and seeing that peace can be attained, and that there are alternatives to aggressive behavior. When we treat children with respect, listen to them and ensure they have a loving and safe environment and actively name these things they may not be familiar with, we have more chance of reaching them and seeing them explore their own values and asking the difficult questions of themselves and others."

Living Values Tolerance Activities Children Ages 8-14:

Tolerance Lessons 4 to 9
A Rainbow

Concept: Compare the variety of races, cultures, and individuals to a rainbow. The rainbow would not be nearly as beautiful if it were missing one or two colors - in fact, it would not be a rainbow with only one color. The human family is like a rainbow; it comes with a wonderful variety of colors. Each culture and tradition has something important to contribute.

Discuss one of the following Reflection Points each day prior to doing the following activities:

• Peace is the goal, tolerance is the method.
• Tolerance is being open and receptive to the beauty of differences.
• The seed of tolerance, love, is watered by compassion and care.
• Those who know how to appreciate the good in people and situations have tolerance.
• Tolerance recognizes individuality and diversity while removing divisive masks and defusing tension created by ignorance. (For 12- to 14-year-old students only.)

Activity: Ask students to make a rainbow. They can make a large one of paper to be placed on the wall, or they can make individual ones.

Activity: Do several lessons on informative stories about the various cultures in your area or country, selecting fiction or non-fiction stories appropriate to the ages of the students. Discuss the information afterwards. Put the culture of each story you read in a different ray of the rainbow. Ask:

• What values are important to this culture?
• How do they show that?

Activity: Ask the students to make up a poem or a song about the human world family as a rainbow.

Activity: Make figures in traditional dress of the cultures you are studying. Place them around the rainbow. Older students could make symbols from that culture, describe relevant characteristics, or write down significant events in the history of that culture.

Activity: Perhaps for one week, one person from a different culture could come in and talk with the class. He or she might be willing to bring in a traditional treat, or share a song, poem, or piece of art from that culture. Perhaps one or two of the guests can teach you a dance.

Tolerance Lesson 11
Discrimination

Awareness Activity - Sharing: Ask students about the lack of tolerance of differences they have noticed at school or in society. Ask students if they can think of an example of intolerance. If they cannot, mention, in age-appropriate terms, one that they might be aware of.

• Are some people tolerated less than others?
• Are some discriminated against? On what basis?
• Have you ever been discriminated against?
• How did it feel?
• What attitude would you like everyone to have toward each other?
• If someone is really popular, will people be more likely to tolerate that person?
• What kinds of things can we say to ourselves so we can have more tolerance of others?

8-9 Activity: Write a few sentences about how people feel when they have been discriminated against, and draw a picture. Then, write two sentences of advice about how people should act.

10-14 Activity: Write a short personal essay about feeling discriminated against, or being treated unfairly. Ask each student to think of his or her advice about how people should treat each other. The teacher may wish to instruct students to focus their advice, that is, if the students are studying the structure of the government, what would their advice be to the leaders of the country? Or, what would their advice be to other students of the world, parents, teachers, or adults? The students could read their advice in small groups, and each group could then make a slogan. Draw the slogans on posters or long pieces of paper and place them on the walls

Strategies for Bullying Prevention by Stan Davis

(he is a school counselor, bullying prevention consultant, and author of Schools Where Everyone Belongs (Research Press, 2005).

Start with the ABCs:

• Respect young peoples' autonomy. We can't make them change. We can increase the cost of their existing behavior by following through with consequences. We can build supportive relationships so they want to be contributing members of the school. We can recognize positive actions. They will choose their behavior; we can help them see they have a choice and help them find the best choices for themselves.
• Maintain young peoples' sense of belonging. When we welcome youth to school each day; when we build mentoring relationships; when consequences are seen as being earned instead of given in anger or rejection; and when we avoid taking their misbehavior personally, young people are more likely to risk changing their behavior.
• Teach cause and effect thinking and promote conscience development. Help young people see the connections between what they do and what happens to them through using predictable, transparent, consistent discipline approaches. Help them connect their positive behavior with positive outcomes. Help them discover the positive and negative effects of their actions on others through observation and reflection. Use questions instead of statements whenever possible so young people learn to think about their own goals and about their behavior.

Website resources:

http:/ /www.splcenter.org/center/tt/teach.jsp

Middle and High School lessons: http://www.pbs.org/americaresponds/tolerance.ht ml

Multi Cultural Education: http://depts.washington.edu/centerme/links.htm

Developing Political Tolerance: http://www.guidancechann el.com/default.aspx?M=a&index=2191&cat=13

Kathy Shea's article: We Need Tolerance Now More Than Ever http://www.guidancechannel.com/default.a spx?index=641%20&cat=1 or http://www.livingvalueseducation.org/S tories/We-Need-Tolerance.htm

Action Kit for Violence Prevention Week http://violencepreventionweek.org/pdf/actionkit.pdf

Online destination for people interested in dismantling bigotry and creating, in hate's stead, communities that value diversity. http://www.tol erance.org/index.jsp

Online portal that offers insightful articles, thought- provoking interviews, tips website reviews, and other content that addresses the social, emotional, and educational issues facing today's youth. It develops award-winning guidance and health videos, DVDs games, activity books, curricula, pamphlets and print materials for the K-12 school market GuidanceCh annel.com

THE MUSEUM OF TOLERANCE, LOS ANGELES: In December 2004, the Museum won the Global Peace and Tolerance Award. http://www.museumoftolerance.com/site/c.juLVJ8MRKt H/b.1580483/k.BE32/Home.htm THE NY TOLERANCE CENTER http://www. museumoftolerance.com/site/pp.aspx? c=arLPK7PILqF&b=249634&printmode=1

International Center for Tolerance Education: Its work is focused on developing young children's understanding of and respect for the differences that exist among themselves, especially those related to culture, ethnicity, gender, race, and socioeconomic status. http://www.seedsoftolerance.org/initiative_t mf_center.html